Contrary to what popular culture dictates, and to what the Grimms’ brothers have been telling us generation after generation, having a sassy step-mom is not that bad. Of course there are a few rotten apples out there, and they seem to get the most PR, but I seriously think that not all of us are that bad. It depends a lot on the circumstances. And a bigger lot on the dad. The dad is the component for the whole step-family to work. He is the key piece that links all the other pieces together, or “sort-of together”. A dad that is not on-board can make the whole ship sink.
There are lots of books and blogs about how difficult it is to live in a step-family, countless complaints from step-children, step-moms, bio parents, aunties and grandparents. But just as not everything is pink and rosy, not everything is bad either. That is why for sanity and harmony’s sake, you need to really hang on the to the good moments in order to sail through the not-so-good ones. So here’s a list of my top 10 good moments in my life as a bonus-mamma, no particular order:
1. Saga saying “Glenda, since you moved in Dad has stopped farting, burping and swearing around the house. It’s so nice!”
2. Elsa saying “Glenda, I know you don’t understand a thing in Swedish, but at least you are happy living here!”
3. The look in their eyes when I dress up, followed by “wow..can I inherit that dress from you when you no longer fit?” (they think I will grow taller, not fatter – or so I tell myself!)
4. Their reasoning: “If you are my bonus-mamma, then your brother’s kids are our bonus-cousins… wow, we have bonus-cousins living in Rusia! cool!”
5. “Glenda, we don’t want to go shopping with Dad ever again! He only takes us to Intersport! You should always take us shopping.”
6. Saga: “I told my friends that we always have pancakes for breakfast on Sundays when we are with you. They are so jealous!” (the ALWAYS bit is a bit untrue, though, but the friends don’t know)
7. At a concert in Gröna Lund. after having ridden all the roller-coasters she wanted to try out, Saga said “Glenda, this is the best day in my whole life!”
8. When they say how much they would love to have a baby brother/sister and even think of baby names
9. When they eat double portions because “it was the best you have ever cooked in your whole life”
10. When they yell out from their beds at night so that I come and tuck them in, and they whisper “I love you” when I lean down to hug them.